THE CEILING IS DOING MATHS
by Bongholio

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Track 1: Stinky Witches & Ugly Ballsacks
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[Yodel Intro]
Yodel-ay-hee-hoo! Yodel-ay-hee-haw! Yodel-ay-hee-hoooo!

[Verse 1]
Out in the holler where the black cats scream
Lives a gang of witches with a terrible ream
They got stinky ol' britches from ridin' them brooms
And a burning hatred for billionaires' doom

While Musk and Bezos and all them tech lords
Are powderin' they ballsacks like delicate whores
The witches are stirrin' up a terrible brew
Sayin' "We gon' hex them ballsacks black and blue!"

[Chorus]
Yodel-ay-hee-hoo! Yodel-ay-hee-haw!
Stinky witches comin' for them ugly ballsacks y'all!
Wrinkled and stankin', hangin' real low
Billionaire ballsacks got nowhere to go!

Dirty britches, stinky witches
Curse your portfolio and curse your britches!
Yodel-ay-hee, yodel-ay-heeee!
Your saggy old ballsacks belong to me!

... (full lyrics above)

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Track 2: Wart Bigger Than My Boner
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[Yodel Intro - frantic]
Yodel-ay-hee-hoo! Yodel-ay-hee-haw! Yodel-ay-fuck-me-hoooo!

[Verse 1]
Woke up this mornin' with a terrible fright
Reached down in my britches, somethin' ain't right
Got a goddamn wart growin' bigger than my boner
Look like a purple cauliflower, it's a real ball-toner

It's bigger than my dick on its very best day
Throbbin' and bobbin' like it's leadin' a parade
The witches in the holler heard me weepin' and cryin'
Said "Boy put your head in the microwave, it's time for dyin'!"

... (full deranged lyrics as generated)

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Track 3: Putting Things in Places
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[Verse 1]
Toronto Union, platform 12
Backpack heavy with the weight of who I am
One way to Sherbrooke, hormones in my blood
Lily's chasing highs she can't afford

The men by the tracks with their hungry eyes
I tell them everything they want to hear, I lie
"I'll fix you baby, I'll never leave"
Promises I know I'll never keep

[Chorus]
I'm putting things in places
Where they don't belong
Rearranging all your careful little songs
Your peace into panic, your order into storm
I swear I didn't mean it, but I do it all the same
Putting things in places
Till you send me away

[Verse 2]
Sherbrooke house, the guest room smells like smoke
I move your photographs, I scatter what you wrote
Your pills in the toilet, your letters in the fire
Your heart in my hands and your trust on the wire
You said I could stay, you didn't know what that means
When the switch flips sudden and I'm no longer me

[Bridge]
Then I'm screaming that you trapped me, that you're just like all the rest
Throwing plates like promises, putting holes in your chest
You call me crazy, I call you the same
Pack my bag in silence, back into the rain

[Verse 3]
Mom, it's Lily... I need another ticket
The one from Sherbrooke, I burned another bridge quick
They kicked me out, said never come back again
Can you wire the money, I'll pay you when I'm better, I swear this time I mean it

Train lights flicker like my brain
I'm going home... again

[Outro]
Putting things in places...
Even in my mother's heart
The rails keep singing my name
They know just who I are

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Track 4: Am I Scoring Right Now?
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[Verse 1]
I am Cornholio! TP for my bunghole!
How the hell did I get in this giant white house?!
There are men in suits, they look very serious
The ceiling is doing maths again, bad swirling numbers!

[Pre-Chorus]
Some angry guys with beards are yelling about a man named Jared
They say he is weak and the other guy Steve is also stupid
I don't know who these people are, why are they so mad at me?
Everything is wobbling and the walls have eyes!

[Chorus]
Am I scoring right now?! Am I scoring right now?!
With a sitar in my bunghole and the ceiling doing maths!
The fancy TV lady is touching me in a crazy way
I think I might be the Great Cornholio... or maybe not today!

[Verse 2]
She is on her knees like in the dirty magazines
Then she gets on top and everything feels electric
The angry beard men are still yelling in the other room
Something about history... I don't know what that means!

[Bridge - Aggressive Confusion]
Are you challenging the Great Cornholio?!
I will show you my bunghole power!
Wait... why is my body exploding?!
Is this winning?! I think this is winning!!!

[Final Chorus - Unhinged]
Am I scoring right now?! Am I scoring right now?!
The TV lady made my whole body go crazy!
I changed something big but I don't know what it was!
Maybe I am the Great Cornholio... maybe I am God!
I... AM... CORNHOLIO!
I... AM... CORNHOLIOOOOOOOOO!!!

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